"Christ dwells with them (married couples), gives them the strength to take up their crosses and so follow him, to rise again after they have fallen, to forgive one another, to bear one another's burdens, to "be subject to one another out of reverence for Christ," and to love one another with supernatural, tender, and fruitful love."
(Catechism of the Catholic Church, 1642)
We have spent the first two weeks reflecting on your wedding day with the promises and vows you made to each other. Throughout these reflections, I have been asking you to let yourself feel and experience the emotions and feelings that were present then and now.
We have spent the first two weeks reflecting on your wedding day with the promises and vows you made to each other. Throughout these reflections, I have been asking you to let yourself feel and experience the emotions and feelings that were present then and now.
Let yourself feel those feelings again. Think of (read over again if you like) your promises and vows to one another. Take a moment to pray and use your promises and vows as part of the prayer. . . . Does an image of marriage arise in your mind as you ponder these? Perhaps it will be one of your wedding pictures or a picture of marriage in your mind. You may imagine a man carrying a woman over a threshold or a baby in her mother's arms. It could be an image seemingly unrelated to marriage, simply let the image come to your mind.
What is the image? If no image arises, stay with your feelings and write more details about these.
What does your image (or your feelings about your vows and promises) suggest about God's purpose for your wedding?
What does your image (or feelings) suggest about your view of marriage?
(Some people like to write a dialogue between themselves and their image. How does your image answer the above questions?)
Once, when we were dating and Mike gave me a hug, his arms encircled mine. I instinctively moved my arms to the outside! We both realized what happened. We smiled and then he put his arms on the outside again. I allowed myself to have my arms on the inside. I realized over time that this involved a trust, a vulnerability and a receiving of Mike's care for me. This theme has re-emerged in many ways over the years of our marriage thus far. This is a striking metaphor for being surrounded and encircled by God's love in and through Mike's love for me.
ReplyDeleteDon't laugh, but I keep picturing a cake topper of a man and woman when I think of marriage (and we did not even have a cake topper like that at our wedding). So I decided I definitely needed to reflect further on this. I feel that my image means a few different things. First of all- the feeling of being "on top of the world (or cake)" and that together with God's help we can overcome any adversity that comes our way. Secondly, a cake topper is of man and woman, but one piece, not two. We are united as one in God's eyes. Make sense or am I rambling.. ? :)
ReplyDeleteJust realized that posting as anonymous does not show my name. Posted by Christi. :)
ReplyDeleteThanks Laura and Christi (or cake topper person) for your reflections. Christi, when you first mentioned cake topper, I did not know where you were going to go with that...then you explained..."a cake topper is of a man and woman, but one piece, not two". Now that is a powerful image!
ReplyDeleteOne our wedding day we are united. Two becoming one flesh. Yes, a cake topper (with your explanation) is a great image.
Laura, you also highlight the loving embrace of our Father that we learn from each other, but each in our own unique way, even in our sexuality. We love uniquely as a man or as a woman and that love to our spouse compliments them and their love of us. This difference in our human person and love is what allows us to unite together in marriage.
I keep going back to our first dance at our reception. Although we were surrounded by friends and family, all I could see was Teresa. It felt like we were a million miles away and we floated as we moved to "our song". We looked into each others eyes and we held each other, and we drifted to the music.
ReplyDeleteWhile we were on the dance floor together, we were surrounded by love from those around us as well as our own love for each other.
I thought of our hands together, and then focused on the wedding rings, especially the traditional woman's set of rings - the diamond engagement ring and simpler wedding band. The engagement ring is the flashier ring, the one to show off to friends and to announce your change in relationship status. It stands alone. But the wedding band is the mate to your husband's ring, and each is only half of the set. I think marriage is like those wedding bands - simple, but enduring, together.
ReplyDeleteThinking of our wedding day, I just remember how happy and at peace I was. I can't explain how I felt, it was just amazing. I married my best friend.
ReplyDeleteJulie said...
ReplyDeleteWhen I think about an image for marriage, I think of a couple dancing, ballroom style. There has to be mutual understanding between them for it to work right, each partner plays a role, and there is a natural give and take.
I think it's a beautiful analogy, and the great thing is, the "dance of life" that is our marriage and family is getting smoother and more natural all the time!
Our wedding dance was actually to "Could I have this Dance" by Anne Murray, and the song speaks to what I wrote above.
Here's a link if you want to listen:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vF8QykqGRq4&feature=PlayList&p=48F96C4B92138714&playnext=1&playnext_from=PL&index=7
Dancing seems to be a popular theme and that makes perfect sense, it is a great image for marriage. The wedding rings are also a powerful symbol of our love for one another and for God's never ending, never failing love for the two of us.
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing these images...
The image that came to mind was a picture taken many years after our wedding of the two of us just laughing together. It was a candid picture, but I think it captured in that one moment the joy of our marriage. The challenges of life can sometimes be unpleasant, but having a partner who completely loves and supports you makes all the difference.
ReplyDelete