As you shared your wedding story in writing and with your spouse, what feelings arose within you? Please describe the feelings.
Have you ever reflected on your marriage vows after the wedding?
When you think about marriage, what is it for you?
The Catechism of the Catholic Church in article 1601 says, "The matrimonial covenant, by which a man and a woman establish between themselves a partnership of the whole of life, is by its nature ordered toward the good of the spouses and the procreation and education of offspring; this covenant between baptized persons has been raised by Christ the Lord to the dignity of a sacrament."
What aspects of marriage in this statement resonate as being true for you? What parts might you disagree with?
Civil society refers to marriage as a contract between two people while the Church refers to marriage as a covenant. A covenant implies so much more than a contract. In a covenant you give your whole self away to another and in turn receive the whole other person. In marriage this is true with your spouse and with God. At the altar we promised to give our whole selves to our spouse (knowing we can not do this on our own) and we gave our whole selves to God asking for his help to love our spouse as God loves us.
(If you have not had a chance to complete the first blog entry 1.1, please do so now.)
We Belong to Each Other
3 years ago
I loved looking back at our wedding day and found myself smiling as I typed! :)
ReplyDeleteThe distinction between civil society's definition of covenant versus the Catholic Church's definition stood out to me and made me think about how we should turn to God more often in our marriage to ask for assistance.
I agree with the statement about procreation and educating our children. I interpret this to mean that God wants us to show our children love through our words AND Actions and to set the example of how God intended married couples to treat each other - with love and respect. Tommy and I are very conscientious about showing our little girls that Mommy and Daddy love each other and are always respectful, even when we disagree.
Reflecting on our wedding day just made me realize how lucky of a man I am to have my beautiful wife and beautiful family.
ReplyDeleteMarriage is such a beautiful thing. Being married to your best friend is the greatest thing God could have given me, not to mention my children. Just knowing that your partner makes the same decisions as you is what marriage is all about. I always do what she would do. I believe we are one.
In the above statement, I believe and live by that everyday.
Thanks for your comments Christi and Tommy. It is so true that the best gift a married couple can give their children is a loving marriage! As Catholics we are called to not only be open to life, but to raise those children the best that we are able...this includes having a happy, healthy and holy marriage.
ReplyDeleteWhen we think back to our wedding day, we do realize how lucky and blessed we are to have another person say and unconditional yes to unconditionally love us the best they can...we know our faults (and so do they) and our spouse still said yes...our next reflection is on what we all said yes to!
When I shared my wedding day story I felt warm and confident. I was never more sure of my love for Teresa and I couldn't wait for our wedding day to arrive. The warmth comes from the fire that glows in our hearts when we are together.
ReplyDeleteWe have had the opportunity to renew our vows several times with Worldwide Marriage Encounter, and each time I have looked deeply into Teresa's eyes and have the same feeling of commitment to her that I had on our wedding day.
Our marriage sacrament is something that we both take very seriously. The meaning that marriage takes on when performed in a church by a member of the clergy is so much more meaningful that a civil service. Having been married by Teresa's father who was a Permanent Deacon was even more of blessing for us.
God is such a big part of our individual lives, I cannot imagine not having God present in our married lives as well. We have been blessed, and we continue to thank God for the blessings that He has shared with us and on our marriage.
I believe that our marriage is a partnership for life, for the good of both spouses and the the children. This is not to say that both partners share equally in all tasks (both the pleasant and the unpleasant), but that all members of the family benefit from a strong and stable partnership. While we have certainly had our disagreements, I have never doubted that I will be with my wife for the rest of my life. There's no reason, no need, no desire to end this life together.
ReplyDeleteWhen I reflected on our wedding day with my husband, it was neat to kind of relive the feelings that I had that day.
ReplyDeleteI have definitely reflected on our wedding vows since our wedding day. Especially during hard times! What the Catechism says feels true to me. Although, I think that marriages in other faiths or even without official faith can have the same merit and sacrificial love.
I see marriage as a union. I feel like God's grace helps hold us together, even when we are stubborn and disagree. I feel truly joined with my husband as lifelong partners. My husband felt like family to me even before we got married, and that bond has gotten stronger and deeper over the years, especially as we became parents together. Marriage is trying to love each other and share that love with our family as God loves us. Which is a daunting task at times!
Joe, I remember that warmth feeling on the wedding day and other moments in marriage too. It is more than just a feeling, it is a sense that our lives are truly one and the love becomes tangible to me.
ReplyDeleteCasey and Tess both highlight the Catechism's definition of marriage as a partnership for life. I agree Tess that when children come along the marital bond is strengthened because we have a new mission/purpose in life to raise these beautiful children. Unfortunately for some couples, children become a source of tension. Raising children are not easy and if our marriage is not on track (and all marriages need adjusting from time to time) raising children can become more difficult. It is important for us to realize when we need adjusting in our marriages and take advantage of resources available to us such as Marriage Encounter weekends that Joe mentioned, or talkig to our pastor/priest or seeking out good Catholic marriage counselors (which I can always provide you) to help us get back on track.
Thanks for all your comments!
When I think about the sacrament of marriage, two Bible passages come to mind -- first, "What God has joined together, let no man put asunder" and "Love is patient, love is kind..." I think nowadays people tend to overlook the work necessary to maintain a strong relationship with one another, and also with God. We show our love, and our commitment, to our spouses and our children through our actions, not just with our feelings. Marriage means a lifelong commitment, and it entails daily sacrifices but also brings great daily joy.
ReplyDeleteI think of a potato sack race where the two partners are tied together for the duration and must physically and emotionally support each other. Both are suffering from a loss of prior freedom and feel the temptation to blame the other for "getting us into this mess" and be hyper-critical of the other's missteps while explaining away our mis-steps (the ground is always more slippery on the husband's side) and looking longingly at the finish line. I am always tempted to do it my way even if it means ignoring my wife's concerns and directions. I think "If only I could just pick her up and carry her across the finish line things would be so much faster and easier."
ReplyDelete